Yo Mama Jokes
Yo mama is so old
Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died. Yo mama so old her social security number is 1! Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class. Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook. Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it. Yo mama so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo mama so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals. Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama is so ugly
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals." Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning. Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it." Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies. Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars. Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween. Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her. Yo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?" Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday. Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects. Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints. Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry. Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower! Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote! Yo mama so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies! Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out! Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested! Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her! Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her! Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone! Yo mama so ugly she turned Medusa to stone! Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween! Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday! Yo mama so ugly if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects! Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry! Yo mama so ugly people go as her for Halloween. Yo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her. Yo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away. Yo mama so ugly we have to tie a steak around your neck so the dog will play with her! Yo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound. Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects. Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
Yo mama is so nasty
Yo mama so nasty she made speed stick slow down. Yo mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach. Yo mama so nasty she made right guard turn left. Yo mama so nasty the fishery be paying her to leave Yo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater. Yo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh. Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.
Yo mama is so short
Yo mama so short she poses for trophies! Yo mama so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence! Yo mama so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime. Yo mama so short she can play handball on the curb. Yo mama so short she does backflips under the bed. Yo mama so short she models for trophys.
Yo mama is so dark
Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent! Yo mama so dark she spits chocolate milk! Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent. Yo mama so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal. Yo mama so dark she has to wear white gloves when she eats Tootsie Rolls to keep from eating her fingers.
Yo mama is so hairy
Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth! Yo mama so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock. Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture! Yo mama so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.
Yo mama is so tall
Yo mama so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon. Yo mama so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida.
Yo mama is so poor
Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving." Yo mama so poor she can't afford to pay attention! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!" Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway. Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk. Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp. Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage." Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut. Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.
Yo mama's head so small
Yo mama head so small she use a tea-bag as a pillow. Yo mama head so small that she got her ear pierced and died.
Yo mama is so lazy
Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs. Yo mama so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote! Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.
Yo mama is so skinny
Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.
Yo mama has
one leg and a bicycle. 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses. so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it. one hand and a Clapper. green hair and thinks she's a tree. one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying. 10 fingers--all on the same hand. a glass eye with a fish in it. a short leg and walks in circles. a short arm and can't applaude. so many freckles she looks like a hamburger! three fingers and a banjo. a wooden leg with a kickstand on it. a bald head with a part and sideburns. a wooden leg with branches. so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.
Yo mama is so greasy
Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid! Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco! Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
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