Sex
Why do Black widow spiders kill there mates after mating?
Why do Black widow spiders kill there mates after mating?To stop the snoring before it starts..
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?Just when it's getting interesting they are finished until next time...
Where does Peter Pan eat?
Where does Peter Pan eat?Wendy's
Two old friends from the mountains ran into each other...
Two old friends from the mountains ran into each other at thelocal bar. One said, "Heard ya went to the big city Jeb." Hisfriend replied, "Yep. Even tried me out one of those 'loosewomen' ya always hear about." "You don't say." said the firstman. "Bet that was costly." "Nope." Jeb smirked. "Kinfolk."at thelocal bar. One said, "Heard ya went to the big city Jeb." Hisfriend replied, "Yep. Even tried me out one of those 'loosewomen' ya always hear about." "You don't say." said the firstman. "Bet that was costly." "Nope." Jeb smirked. "Kinfolk."
After their love-making session the young bride asks her husband...
After their love-making session the young bride asks her husband "Wasmaking love to me really the same as making love to Marilyn Monroe?""Yes, she's dead to!""Was making love to me really the same as makinglove to Marilyn Monroe?""Yes, she's dead to!"
A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife...
A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wifeone Friday evening and read's: Dear Wife (that's whathe called her) I am 54 and by the time you receive thisletter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautifuland sexy 18 year old secretary. When he arrived at thehotel there was a letter waiting for him as follows:Dear Husband (that's what she called him) I too am 54and by the time you receive this letter I will be atthe Hilton Hotel with my handsome and virile 18 yearold toy boy. You being an accountant will therefore appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many many more timesthan 54 goes into 18!!!!
What is the difference between a golf ball and a g-spot?
What is the difference between a golf ball and a g-spot?A man will spend two hours searching for a golf ball.
Did you hear about the hooker that had her appendix taken out?
Did you hear about the hooker that had herappendix taken out?Now she does business on the side!
What kind of Bees...
What kind of Bees make honey? Honey Bees!What kind of Bees make Milk? BOOBIES!
What is the difference between condoms and coffins?
What's the difference between condoms and coffins?They both hold something stiff but one's coming andone's going!
Why does Barbie never get pregnant?
A Ken and Barbie Joke: Why does Barbie never get pregnant?Because Ken always comes in a box!
Want some of this?
Mongo's old lady decided she wanted t dosomething special to please him on hisbirthday, so she bought a pair of crotchlesspanties. That night, as he came into the house, shelay sprawled on the couch spread-eagle."Hi hon," she purred sexily. "Y'all wantsome of this?""Hell, no!" he hollered. "Look at what it'sdone to your undies!"
What is another term for cunnilingus?
What's another term for cunnilingus? Genital Slurpees.
A man, being on top of a woman...
A man, being on top of a woman, says after a while: "Honey, your tits are too small, and your boxis too tight,""Get off my back, dear!" she replies
So one sperm says to the other...
So one sperm says to the other "When do we get to the ovaries?"The other replies "Ovaries! We're not even past the throat yet!"
What the difference between true love and herpes?
What the difference between true love and herpes? - Herpes lasts forever
A girl gets a tatoo of Santa Claus on one...
A girl gets a tatoo of Santa Claus on one thighand a turkey on the other. She wants to show thatthere is something good to eat in betweenThanksgiving and Christmas.
Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick...
Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick areperched near the front door of the girls' dorm. Severalplain Janes walk by as the two converse.Then a Sharon Stone look-alike emerges from the dorm andsaunters past. Romeo turns, smiles, and -- barely audibly-- inquires, "Tickle your ass with a feather?"The young beauty -- startled by what she thinks she heard-- exclaims "What?!" Without missing a beat, Romeo repeats"Typical nasty weather?" "Oh," she demures, "yes," and goeson her way.More young lovelys walk by and the scene is repeated."Tickle your ass with a feather?" "What?" "Typical nasty weather?"Finally, Romeo delivers his line,"Tickle your ass with a feather?" and his prospect stops,smiles and invites him up to her room.Now the sidekick, alone, having paid close attention,decides to try this remarkable new technique. A likelyprospect comes near. The sidekick leers and blurts out,"Cram a feather up your ass?"Shocked, the girl spins around and slaps him, to whichhe replies, "Looks like rain!"
What is the difference between "ooh" and "aah?"
What's the difference between "ooh" and "aah?" -About three inches.
Have you heard about the new Mechanical Whore?
Have you heard about the new Mechanical Whore? -She gives a licking and keeps on ticking.
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